Sunday, August 31, 2008

Dream Weaver

So the truth is I feel like my life just isn't that interesting these days. I have been consumed by student teaching. CONSUMED! And while I am enjoying a love/hate relationship with it, I'm just not sure I feel comfortable talking about it on my blog being that I'm working with minors and all. So I may occasionally share the stupid things that I do, 'cause let's be honest, it'll happen, but I won't talk much about the kids.

I have, however, had some interesting dreams that I would like you to interpret for me.

Here's dream #1:

I'm getting the mail down at the end of the driveway of my house in Michigan. A nice looking woman pulls up and asks me directions back to town. I explain it to her and she asks if I'll ride with her part of the way. I see a child in the backseat and she smiles real nice, so I figure why not? I hop into the car and quickly realize she is actually kidnapping me so she can breed lice in my hair. I narrowly escape with my life and my scalp intact.

Please explain.

Dream #2:

I am at the Olympics in the water cube. The U.S. is missing a competitor for an event so I volunteer and get put on the docket. The event? One lap in the pool using the stroke of your choice. The really unique thing about this race is that everyone is in the same lane and the pool is filled with chocolate instead of water. I got third.

Am I crazy? Normal? Imbalanced? Harboring secret desires? I just don't know.

And my final thought for you is not a dream but an actual conversation with my love.

Me: Hey babe? Where's that dusting rag I like to use?

My Love: I don't know... Just use one of those washcloths.

Me: Ew! No! I wash my face with those!

My Love: ....

Me: Tyson...? What else do you use those washcloths for?

My Love: Um, you know, cleaning stuff. Like the bathtub... and maybe the toilet...

Me: *gag*

Monday, August 25, 2008

Pet peeves vol. 2

You may remember this friendly little post from a few months ago. Well, I think it's time for another.

#1. Automatic flushing toilets.
Due to our recent travels I have come into contact with hundreds, if not thousands of these little flushers and I have taken the liberty of putting them into 3 categories.

-The Anticipator: This toilet just can't wait to flush. It will either do so while you are sitting there, or flush before you even get to go ie: while you are putting the little paper cover on the seat sending it down the drain. This may happen multiple times.

-The Turbo: This is the toilet that flushes with such vigor and vim that it simultaneously deafens you and covers the seat with little droplets. This type of toilet can be predicted by the state of the seat when you walk in and when combined with The Anticipator it is both a terror and a bidet. A hand flush version of The Turbo is found most often on airplanes.

-The Staller: This toilet waits so long to flush that you have already waited five minutes, waved your hand over the sensor, then leaned over the apparatus, about to push the button before it sends your leftovers to potty heaven. Anything that prolongs your presence in a public bathroom stall is no good as far as I'm concerned.

(I would however, be happy to use this one)

#2. Cereal bags glued to the bottom of the box.

Ugh! The bag is hard enough to open already! When it's been superglued to the bottom of the box the only possible result is having the bag rip awkwardly in order to spill half your cereal into the bottom of the box. This cereal will become stale and fall into your bowl and all over the counter anytime you try to pour it resulting in 4 - 6 cranky mornings, depending on your average cereal intake.

#3. Utah drivers.

Bah. The only time we were cut off in Washington was by a driver with Utah plates. And that's all I have to say about that one.



#4. People who don't wash their hands after using public bathrooms.
Say it with me now... Eeeew! Yeah sure, maybe you didn't "touch anything" when you went but still. Someone else might have and they used the same stall and flusher that you did. Wash them for my sake if not your own. I need the peace of mind.

#5. Hair getting closed in the car door.
What? Yeah. Honestly, I'm not even sure how this happened. The wind was blowing while I was getting into the car and my hair just blew up and out as I closed the door. When I leaned back to buckle up... "Sonofaouchiemamma". Scalped by my car. Not really. But it hurt really really bad. Is that a sign I need to cut my hair? Maybe.

And those are my pet peeves... For now.

Once again, be sure to vent your own to me. I love hearing them because it makes me feel a little less strange. And sometimes a little more strange.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

The first week

Hello my friends!

Are you all in withdrawal from my lack of blogging? Yes? Oh thank you, that makes me feel good.

So, student teaching has begun and now I have no time to blog or do anything else for that matter. I seriously thought that I would have more time to myself but IT HAS CONSUMED ME!!

Oy, I have a headache.

But don't worry about me friends, I'll be ok. Still the same old me.

For example, I had to go to a staff meeting on the first day of school and in the midst of trying to be cool (high school's effect on me) and trying to make friends, I looked down at the pen I had been flipping around.

First Colon...

Well. That's interesting.

Apparently the "Y" of my First Colony Bank pen had rubbed off leaving me the butt of the joke. I giggled nervously (and silently of course so as not to interrupt the quality speech going on in the front of the room) and used my fingernail to scrape off the "N".

... and the "O" for good measure.

That was my first faculty meeting, and tomorrow ends my first week at school. I've already started a countdown to the end.

Don't tell.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Celebrity Status

Did I ever tell you guys that I know a celebrity? Yeah, I'm pretty cool eh?

Ok... perhaps know is a bit, um, friendly and even the definition of celebrity may be too strong depending on your opinion.
What I'm saying is that I stalked Donny Osmond when he came to the mall one day.
Let me tell you how it all went down.
I was working at the mall in a jewelry store happily cleaning the cases (ok, I might have been reading a book, but hey, it was a slow night) when I looked up and saw the Donny. My mind instantly flashed to the last time I saw Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat and I was starstruck. Where was he going? I had to know.
So as soon as he walked around the corner I power walked in my pointy toed high heeled shoes down to the end of the jewelry store and peered down the hall. He was walking toward... Old Navy? Nordstrom? Banana Republic? Hard to tell. I had to carefully and gently prop the upper half of my body over the glass counter to see but again, it was a slow night. No one would come in.
Shoot! Someone's coming in! Of all the unlucky times for the one customer of the night to walk in... I trudged over to help the woman who was not in fact a real customer, just someone who wanted her ring cleaned, and then went back to my post.
Great, I had no idea where he went. He could have gone out an exit down there and I wouldn't have a clue. I went back to my book, mourning the one who got away when egad! Here he comes! I shrank back against the wall. I couldn't let him see me staring at him like some twitterpated teenager. I wasn't even sure if I liked him that much, but he was a star, or something.
So there he went, walking toward the food court. Excellent. Perfect time for my dinner break. I casually wandered his way, secretly stalking my prey when I realized...
I would not be talking to Donny Osmond. I would not be asking for his autograph. Why? Because I am a wimp and I don't want to be annoying. Chagrined, I ordered a 6-inch turkey bacon sandwich from subway and walked back to work casually passing Donny on the way. Maybe he would ask for my autograph. Nope.
I went back to work and continued on with my life telling everyone I knew that I saw Donny Osmond. It was a good day.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Florida

Earlier this week Tyson and I got to take a FREE trip to Florida so that he could interview with Harris Corp. I was excited that they invited me to come along especially since the trip was scheduled during our anniversary.

The first thing we noticed when we got off the plane was this sign. Well hello Harris! We do indeed feel welcome now, thank you very much.

Even though it was Sunday when we got there, we needed to go to the store to pick up a few items for dinner and breakfast the next day (since the evil plane people won't let you bring anything these days). After we finished those errands we went back to our hotel which was right on the beach.
After getting back we couldn't let that lovely beach go to waste! Don't worry, we just stuck our feet in the water. We didn't want to sin too many times on the Sabbath, what with our grocery shopping and all.
Before we came out everyone told us that August was the worst possible month to come and so we shouldn't let the weather make our decision for us. We didn't really think it was so bad though. Don't get me wrong, it was humid and hot and I felt like I was suffocating every time I walked outside, but still... not as bad as I was expecting.

And of course since we were there for our anniversary we had to go out.


Tyson was shocked that I was the one wearing shorts while he wore pants. It was quite the role reversal.

The view from our room.
Once it was no longer the Sabbath Tyson and I got as much swimming in as we could.
The water was so warm! There were a ton of shells at the shoreline threatening to slice your feet into bits but once you got past that the ground was a silky sand. It was really really nice. No waves to speak of, but it was great for just swimming around.

We saw hundreds of holes all over the beach and spent quite a bit of time using our detective skills to figure out what was causing them. It wasn't until we went swimming early the next day before everyone else came out that we saw the culprit. There were crabs EVERYWHERE! Seriously, they were all over the place. Well... lets just say that it was a good thing we were done at the beach by the time we figured that one out. I would have been less impressed with Florida had a crab pinched my toes. We gingerly skipped bravely marched our way back to the hotel and got ready to go.

Our time in Florida was fun, we should be getting an offer from them in a day or two. Then it will be up to us to decide where we want to raise our children, work all day, and live the rest of our lives. But I'm not stressed about this monumental decision. Oh no. Not at all.

Pray for us.

Monday, August 11, 2008

3 years

Has it really been 3 years? Part of me feels like the time went so fast that it couldn't possibly be more than 1 year since we committed to each other. Another part of me feels like I've known Tyson my whole life and 3 years can't begin to encompass the extent of our lives together. I didn't know what marriage would bring but I do know that what we've had has exceeded every expectation I could have imagined.
Thank you my love for a wonderful 3 years.
Here's to an eternity more.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

I am...



... Roger Hammer's daughter
(Yes, I am fly fishing and loving it.)

Here's a question...

What rational person locks themselves in a tiny room with hundreds of bugs, a smell that is more of a physical presence than an odor and then exposes their most precious nether regions to a black pit of endless despair?
I do.

But only when forced to do so by the Sanitary Maintenance Enforcers of Local Latrines Yonder (S.M.E.L.L.Y.) who run the "facilities" at the campsite where we stayed. (not a real organization)
So honestly, when I initially saw/smelled (I'm not sure which came first) the bathroom at this campground I actually looked around for a private place where I could dig my own hole. Seriously. And you know... It didn't even need to be that private to qualify. But the ground was hard and I didn't have a shovel yadda yadda yadda.

So I conducted an inspection which yielded me more trepidation than if I had gone in blindfolded and decided that I could wait awhile. Well, awhile turned out to be not as long as I hoped so I girded up my loins and pranced in dodging spiders and flys while preparing for the inevitable...

...

...Blast! I had never had a problem with stage fright until this very moment, the one time when I needed to get in and get out in the shortest time possible. I whined to myself. "C'mon, we need to get outta here!" I like to speak to myself as if I were two people when in frightening situations. A fly landed on my knee. Slap! "Any day now..."

Let's not go into details but suffice to say, I barely escaped with my life and lived to use the potty several more times before we left. And you know, each time got a little easier.

Ok, no it didn't. It actually got worse as the night came on but whatever. I need to move on from this and enjoy the running water that I have at home which I am very very grateful for.
Amen.

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Busy Bee

So we have been so busy lately! Tyson had his last day of his internship on Friday and we went to Seattle that night to celebrate (and to just see Seattle since I had never been there). We spent the night and enjoyed all the sights that the big city had to offer. More on that later.

Tomorrow I head out to go on a fishing/camping trip with Tyson and his Dad -brave, I know- but don't worry, it's just for one night and there are bathrooms. That I can handle.

After camping we'll have just another day or two in Washington before we drive to Rupert Idaho for a Lowder family reunion. We'll spend a night there too and then drive back home to Utah. Hooray! But the fun doesn't stop there.

Less than 12 hours later we'll leave for Florida so that Tyson can interview with a company there. We want to have a few places to compare before we take an offer. The company is paying for us both to go which is great since this trip falls right on our 3 year anniversary.

After we get back from that I will have 5 short days at home before (yikes!) student teaching begins. I am totally excited and nervous for that to start and I really wish that I had more than 5 days to prepare. Oh well, that's life.

So basically what I am trying to say is, if I don't blog for awhile don't hate me!! I'm just probably not anywhere near a computer with internet access. But I love you all and I'm sure after a chaotic semester of student teaching I'll be back on a regular basis. Ok, hopefully before then.

Signing off,
Mari

P.S. I have Breaking Dawn but I'm not going to get a chance to read it for another week or so, so don't DON'T tell me anything. Just don't do it. Please.